I hate to say it, but kids today don't know how good they've got it!
1. When I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to
know something, we had to go to the library and look it up
ourselves, in the card catalog!!
2. There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a
letter ... with a pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the
street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to
get there!
3. There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to steal music,
you had to hitchhike to the record store and shoplift it yourself! Or
you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ
would usually talk over the beginning.
4. We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the
phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it!
5. And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the
phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school,
your mom, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections
agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your
chances, mister!
6. We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with
high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like
'Space Invaders' and 'asteroids' and the graphics were horrible!
Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your
imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens; it was
just one screen forever! And you could never win. The game just
kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you
died! Just like LIFE!
7. When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as
stadium seating! All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy or
some old broad with a hat sat in front of you and you couldn't see,
you were just screwed!
8. Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like
15 channels and there was no onscreen menu! You had to use a
little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on!
9. And there was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get
cartoons on Saturday Morning .. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We
had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons!
10. And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat
something up, we had to use the stove or go build a fire ... imagine
that! If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop
thing or a pan with HOT oil and Real popcorn kernels and shake it
all over the stove forever like an idiot.
11. When we were on the phone with our friends and our parents
walked-in, we were stuck to the wall with a cord, a 7 foot cord
that ran to the phone - not the phone base, the actual phone. We
barely had enough length to sit on the floor and still be able to
twirl the phone cord in our fingers. If you suddenly had to go to the
bathroom - guess what we had to do.....hang up and talk to them
later.
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